{Infertility: Update One}

It's kind of horrifying that I had to label this "Update One"...because who knows how many infertility updates we'll have to give. 

So just to start off...we're still not pregnant...and it's okay. 

Really.

We're okay. That's one thing we want everyone to know. We really are doing okay. 

We are soaking up this time as husband and wife, understanding that this is an incredibly unique time in our lives. 

We had an appointment with our infertility doctor last week, and he said he's not worried about us convincing naturally...THANK GOD!

We went into that appointment thinking he could say a few things.

1. "your chances of conceiving naturally is very low"

2. "you might as well just start the IVF process" and of course because I always go there

3. "you'll never be able to have a baby together." 

So the fact that the doctor was so relaxed and encouraging was such a relief! 

However, he did say that some people who have perfect blood work, perfect genes, perfect situations have to go through IVF...and sometimes don't end up with a baby.

It's kind of funny, because when we were dating/engaged and talking about having kids, we always said that we would wait to start trying three years after we got married. 

Well tomorrow is our three year anniversary.

So maybe "three" was a God given "number" and He is sticking to it even though we decided to change our plan.

Who knows...I guess we'll find out someday!

I just want to give encouragement to some of the people who e-mailed me and are going through the same struggle.

You are not alone, you are strong, and you will be okay. 

Sleep soundly that His plan is infinitely better than ours...although we're all confident that our plans pretty much rock. 

We really do feel extremely at peace.

Well I'll take that back, I feel at peace all but one day a month...and it's right when I start cramping. 

It's the most frustrating thing...wanting something so bad...and to feel your body taking that away. 

So that day every month is a pretty sad one in our house. 

Wendel is incredible...I know you already know that...but I'm just reiterating the fact. 

A few weeks ago when that day happened, I was depressed. 

I really thought this was our month...I kept thinking how incredible and redeeming it would be to have conceived after we "told our story"... 

And to be honest...I was pissed for a day or two. 

But I keep coming back to how calm I really feel. 

I would say I'm a pretty anxious person and suffer from a lot of anxiety.

And I'm not anxious about this at all...I'm very much at peace.

So I'm just going to thank God for that, and continue on my merry way.

That doesn't mean that I'm not sad...sometimes. 

We're going to enjoy this summer of traveling {six weekends in a row might I add} to see friends get married, and vacations {hello Mexico}, we're going to soak up that pool of ours, and continue working on projects for the basement. 

We're also thankful because Wendel will for sure be done with his masters when this baby decides to grace us with his/her presence! 

As much as I wish I was snuggling our baby this morning while watching the Today Show...I'm not...and it's okay. 

Thank you for your support, encouragement, and prayers! 

We love you all and can't thank you enough!

{This picture is a sneak peek at our three year anniversary photo shoot that I'll be sharing tomorrow! So check back to see the gorgeousness from Burning Chair Photography}